My Prayer August 10, 2008

I miss my mom very much. This December 27th, she will have been gone for five years now. I can’t believe it has been that long since she went Home, and I can’t imagine not getting to talk to her or see her for the rest of my life here on earth. People told me it would get easier as the years went by, but for me it seems to get harder, especially as we add kids and they get older, because I know they are missing out in their lives not having the privilege to know and spend time with my mother.

She was amazing, beautiful, strong, courageous, stubborn, sassy, bossy, but most of all, she just loved the Lord. I still cannot even comprehend how she endured everything that she had to in her short life…being so sick for most of my life, and on top of everything else, being betrayed by the person she loved the most and left to cope with her illness alone. I cannot comprehend it because I don’t have an ounce of the faith that she had. No matter the circumstances that she was enduring at the time (one of the countless surgeries, being poked and prodded on endlessly, having to deal with a selfish and just as stubborn teen-ager…and dealing with all of this alone) she never lost her smile or never ceased to praise God…because she knew then what I look back and see now. That God had a plan and purpose for every single bit of suffering she had to go through…that none of it was done in vain or wasted. I have had so many of her doctors, nurses, friends, and people that didn’t know her, but heard her story, tell me how much her faith touched and impressed their lives. Because wherever she went, whoever she came in contact with, she always made it a point to tell everyone about her faith and because of it she could have joy in the midst of her storms.

My prayer is that I will be able to touch and change lives as my mom did and still continues to do when I share her story. For that is how lives are changed…by being real with people. They don’t want to know how to get to Heaven or what Bible verses they need to memorize to be saved (this is all important, but not to reach the lost!) They want to know how our lives are different…what makes our God special and how knowing Him has changed our life. People are hungry, hurting, and searching, and they need to know that God is real and works in our lives daily. It’s not enough to tell them of His promises and love…we need to tell them and show them how His promises and love have brought us through life’s circumstances in a real and tangible way.

I Miss my Doctors!! August 5, 2008

I absolutely loved my OBGYNs back home! If any of you are looking for a good doctor, I went to Marietta OBGYN Affiliates. There are several doctors in the group, and I would not say a bad thing about any of them…they were just really great doctors. I am struggling with that now!! Being pregnant again, I thought I would go ahead and try to set up an appointment. Several doctors in the area had been referred to me as being good, so I thought it would be easy! Let’s just say the fifth time is a charm. The first four that I called were not taking any new patients. I’m a little concerned because the one that I ended up with is in the same group as some of the others that I called, but she was the only one in the group accepting new patients…so what does that say about her? The good thing is the hospital I will deliver at is almost within walking distance of our house and the women’s center is fairly new. Also the hospital has a huge digital billboard where they post the names of the new babies born there every day. We’ll have to get Mikey to go and take a picture of that when we have the baby:)

God is bigger than palmetto bugs!! August 3, 2008

The homesickness is starting to set in…especially with the uninvited welcoming of Savannah’s own palmetto bugs that frequent our house at least once a day. We have been told that this is normal, they are not “dirty bugs” (as if there is a difference) that come in your house because it is nasty…they are trying to escape the heat. Still, I AM NOT a bug person, I won’t even kill one because they are so big they crunch when you step on them. Oh, and we don’t have to worry about being under a drought here, it rains everyday!! I have to sweep and clean our floors just about everyday because of the sand and wet grass that the kids and dog track in.

We had friends and family with us for the first week, and I thought that I was ready for them to leave so we could get to normal, but now I’m ready for everyone to come back! Loneliness is starting to set in and I feel so detached from our core group!

I keep reminding myself that God is bigger than all of this…He put us here for a reason…He almost made it too easy, with the way He has worked out every detail (we even have a bite on our house!!) I just did not realize it would be this difficult to just leave everything behind. But, God doesn’t want us to become complacent in our faith. Now, more than ever, He wants Justin and I to fully rely on Him so that He can reveal another piece of the puzzle.

Tired of packing!!! July 23, 2008

Remind me to never move again!!! I did not imagine how stressful this event could possibly be. We moved a lot as a child, but now I’m the grown-up having to take care of everything. Plus, for those of you that haven’t heard yet, we are now expecting our fourth child. No, we did not do it on purpose…this is totally a God-thing, because no one in their right mind would get pregnant on purpose while trying to move five hours away!! I am unbelievably exhausted and stressed, poor Justin is having to carry much of this load himself. I don’t know what I would do without him or Kevin and Jen (our best friends) who have gone above and beyond in helping us!!

Finally Moving!! July 17, 2008

Well, we are packing up and heading out to Savannah next Friday. We find a cute house to rent that is exactly what we needed in mid-town. I have so many emotions going through me right now…excitement, anxiety. relief, stress, sadness…I honestly don’t know how to pin-point one feeling. We have been anxiously waiting this day and now that it is upon us, I feel kind of detached from the whole experience. It’s almost as if up until now, it was a dream, something that we were planning on doing in the future, but now it’s actually reality.

The scariest thing is, we haven’t even started to pack…we don’t even know where to start! How in the world do you accumulate so much junk in seven years??? We are also kind of stressed about our house not selling yet, but I know God will work that out in His own timing. The market is so bad right now that our realtors told us they were actually advising people not to put their houses on the market right now. Oh well, we’ll be okay for a while because Justin got that severance package at work. I’m just trying to focus on one thing at a time and not get bogged down in all of the details. I have to remind myself these are just puzzle pieces and God can see the whole puzzle!

WOW!! July 1, 2008

That’s all I know to say…God just totally answered a prayer!! Justin just got layed off at work because they were having to make cut-backs. This is an answered prayer because he was sweatin’ having to quit in a few weeks anyways and this way he gets a nice severance package that will keep us on our feet in Savannah even if we don’t sell our house right away! I am just in awe at how God works…He totally has taken care of a need (I am shaking while I write this!!).  If He has done this, I am so excited to see what else He has in store…Savannah here we come!!:)

Puzzle Piece June 26, 2008

We just got back from Charleston with some friends last night. It was just great to get away for a few days and hang out with our best friends, especially since we are about to move away from them…don’t even want to think about that right now, we’ve been best friends and inseperable since our freshmen year of high school! Charleston is beautiful and has so much history to offer (I am a huge history buff, especially American history!)

On Monday, we drove down to Savannah so I could finish up some paperwork and so our friends could see where we will be moving to. I am getting very anxious! It was kind of frustrating having to come back home to a place that I don’t feel is my home anymore! I also found out that my first day back to work is August 18. I would like to be moved and settled before I have to go back and things are just not progressing with our house. Justin also really needs to find a job, especially if we are going to have to pay rent and make a mortgage payment. I just keep telling myself that God sees the big picture and that this is just a puzzle piece.

It’s Not Always What’s on the Inside That Counts! June 20, 2008

Ever since we felt God calling us to go to Savannah, He has been working on several of my heart issues that are not pleasing to Him. I think He is breaking me and preparing me to go! But it’s not always what’s on the inside that counts…God is concerned with our outward appearance as well. I have truly been convicted this week of my weight and unhealthyness (is that a word?) God has told me that I am being disobedient by not offering Him my whole self…by over-indulging in food and by not being a good steward of one of His most important gifts…my body. We are told in the Bible…

 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have recieved from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.  1 Corinthians 6:19-20

I have definitely not been honoring God with my body. This is somewhat of a superficial issue…I am definitely not happy with the way I look, but more importantly it’s a health issue and a spiritual issue. I can not do this alone…over-eating and exercizing are a struggle for me, but I know that God who is begginning this work in my life will be faithful until its completion. 

Felt Like Home June 15, 2008

We attended Church at the Ridge this morning for the first time since Mother’s Day (we have been visiting around other church plants with our Canvas core group to get ideas!). It was so great to be back, we have definitely missed our church family there! It was so nice because it really didn’t even feel like we had been gone, we were just able to pick up with everyone where we had left off and everyone was so encouraging and uplifting about our future move to Savannah. It was definitely good to get the encouragement boost!

I truly feel that God used this season in our lives at Church at the Ridge to prepare us for our work with Canvas. It was definitely a step out of mine and Justin’s confort zones going there because we left the church that I had practically grown up in, where we got married, where Lily Grace first attended, to come to CATR where we didn’t know anyone. It was also hard because Justin and I have always attended traditional southern baptist churches that had church buildings and all you did was show up on Wednesdays and Sundays for choir practice, bible studies, and worhip, and then leave. There was no setting up, taking down, or serving really. Our journey there has been so amazing…our marriage has been strengthened and our family has been strengthened…we will always carry in our hearts the relationships and the inspiration that God blessed us with there. 

House For Sale!! June 12, 2008

Please spread the word…if you know of anyone looking for a smaller house for sale!! I have to start work on August 18, so I am getting very anxious because I would really like to be moved and settled before I have to go back to work. I know this is my plan, but I am desperately hoping and praying it is God’s as well:) We have someone looking at it right now who seemed very interested, so please pray!!